Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Praying For Our Children's Marriage and Purity

It's been a while since I stepped back in time with you to share from my journals, so I believe for at least the next few days I will be doing that... God has stirred the journals up within me and brought it to my remembrance so I think I just might ought to obey.

Today we are stepping back in time to December 30, 2002. At this point I had been on fire for my God for a whole year!
This journal entry is only one of many written prayers over my children and nieces and nephews and one of countless spoken prayers over them.

I just lift Shelby and Ashleigh and Emoni and Alex up to You Lord.
I just ask that You be preparing them all a spouse Lord.
A spouse who walks in Your ways and lives by Your commands.
I ask that You prepare Shelby, Ashleigh, Emoni, and Alex for these spouses.
I pray that they will have the strength and heart and fear and love for You Lord that they will wait for the spouses You have prepared for them.
I pray for Shelby, Emoni, and Alex's salvation.
I pray that Ashleigh will keep her eyes fixed on You!
I pray that they will all seek Your face and seek to know You intimately!
I pray Your hand of protection over them!
Keep them safe and surrounded by godly people who truly love You and them!
I pray that they will serve You with their lives and that they will be mighty witnesses for Your kingdom!
In Jesus name,

(Yes, I pray in exclamation points. I don't know why. I just always have since I began writing down my prayers )

It is never too soon to begin praying for our children's marriages. At the time of this journal entry my Shelby was only a year and a half and my Ashleigh was eleven. My niece Emoni was five and my nephew Alex was two and a half. My list of marital and purity prayers has grown tremendously since this day in 2003. My Bekah has been added and many more nieces and nephews and cousins and children (and yes even my college and young singles) who are mine in the Lord, because once I have met you and taught you I claim you as my prayer priority especially in the area of marriage and purity. It is the area that I struggled with and failed at greatly and the scars are many, so these scars that I carry remind me often to intercede on behalf of others in this area. 

Our children and loved ones may stumble in this area, but it doesn't mean we stop praying. Grace and forgiveness and a new beginning is always available in Christ. He will help them bear His indignation while He restores them and stands them up on their feet again. I know this is true because He did it with me and there is no partiality with God.

 For the LORD your God is the God of gods
and the Lord of lords,
the great, the mighty, and the awesome God
who does not show partiality nor take a bribe.
Deuteronomy 10:17

For there is no partiality with God
Romans 2:11

Scripture just can't get more clearer than that :-)

As parents we must not just pray for our children, but we must set clear standards and boundaries to protect our children's sexual purity and future marriages. No we cannot stick them in a closet when they reach puberty and guard it with our semi-automatic and keep them there until we handpick their spouse and then take them from the closet bound and gagged and blindfolded until we get to the church to remove the gag right at the time for them to say "I do" at the altar, although we can dream...

But we can protect them and their innocence and guard their eyes and hearts. It is our job as parents to set the boundaries. I cringe when I hear of parents picking up their twelve year olds and dropping them off at the movies with a girlfriend/boyfriend. This is absolutely the worst time to leave your child in the dark alone with their hormones and a person of the opposite sex that puts butterflies in their stomach.

 We have a little sister,
And she has no breasts;
What shall we do for our sister
On the day when she is spoken for?
“If she is a wall,
We will build on her a battlement of silver;
But if she is a door,
We will barricade her with planks of cedar.”
Song of Solomon 8:8-9

We also cannot leave our children unaware. If they hear the whole truth from us, then we can squash the lies that come with curiosity and learning about the birds and bees from peers. If you are wondering how to approach the topic of sex with your children, just simply begin a family study in the book of Genesis. 

When I began this study with my Shelby we didn't make it past the second chapter before the birds and bees were addressed.

 For this reason
a man shall leave his father and his mother,
and be joined to his wife;
and they shall become one flesh.
Genesis 2:24

My Shelby read Genesis 2:24 and said "Momma, I understand the one part, but what's the flesh?"
Open door...

Having baby nephews around that my little one had seen have diaper changes and given baths made it very easy and simple to explain how God made the boy and girl parts to come together as one flesh. There was no graphic detail needed, no fancy explanations, just the simple facts settled her curiosity and my honesty and openness let her know that she was free to come to me with any question she had about this issue or really any issue.

As we share the truth and set up boundaries and teach our children what God says about this beautiful thing called sex that was meant for the confines of marriage, if or when, our children fall prey to the lies of the enemy and the world, they will know it. They will have truth for the Holy Spirit to pull out and convict their hearts so that they might turn from the lie and take back hold of the truth.


  1. My two sons are grown men now and I am happy, proud and honored to be able to say that this idea of praying for your baby's future mates really works and is a beautiful thing!!
    My sons are with amazing young women that I would have chosen for them if given that job. Yay! And thank you Father!