Christmas Struggles

Yes, I must confess that I am the woman whose stomach starts churning and dreading the coming too soon Christmas season around October...

Why?

The whole money issue.

Yes, I am a woman who hates spending money... shocking as it may sound. There are some women who do not fall into the shopaholics anonymous category. I even refuse to stop at a gas station that won't allow me to pay at the pump because I do not want to be tempted to buy cokes and bags of chips along with my gas.

I feel guilty for every dime I spend on me. I hate to shop... so I only go when I am in actual desperate need of something.

When at the beach earlier this month it was colder than I had packed for and so I needed to pick up a warm outfit. We went to an outlet mall and I found a fleece sweatsuit that was on sale for %60 off, yet I still walked around the store for an hour, yes literally an hour, trying to decide whether or not my conscience was good with making the purchase. I was praying for the okay from God as I was trying to decide if I was under conviction or condemnation.

Does anyone else do this?

So now Christmas is here, the purchasing must be done...
Now once the shopping actually begins I usually get excited because I get caught up in the joy of actually buying things that my loved ones will really be excited to receive... so I am not a complete scrooge :-)

Now our first purchase from our Christmas budget was for our home, we have some repairs that need to be done, and I have been wanting a new chandelier since we purchased our home over five years ago (I got a gift card to pick one out with last year, but the vacuum cleaner broke, so I got a vacuum cleaner instead) and we picked one up when we purchased the material to do the repairs. Then the day before yesterday I made my first Christmas purchases for our girls and I was excited and ready to shop some more... bring on the Christmas cheer!

Then that night about 10:30pm we open the laundry room door to discover the catch-pan under the hot water heater two inches deep in water.

Great. 

My first thought was...
Yep this is my punishment for shopping,
I knew I spent too much,
And we shouldn't have bought that chandelier, we should take it back.
Hello, Murphy! I knew you wouldn't stay gone for long...

(pout, pout, frown, sigh)

Then I remembered that my God was Jehovah-jireh, our Provider.
I remembered that we had prepared our budget and saved all year to make these purchases.
I remembered that God was sovereign over even hot water heater issues and I would not pout, frown, or sigh in doubt or frustration.
I would trust Him to meet our needs.
Murphy would not steal my joy.

And guess what...
God was faithful.
Imagine that :-)

I will enjoy Christmas this year.
I will enjoy the time shopping with my husband as we buy gifts for our loved ones.
And maybe, just maybe, next Christmas I will not even experience that stomach churning dread of the coming Christmas season.

So how about you?
Do you want to throw up the first time you see the "so many days until Christmas" sign?
Or are you the one who starts counting the days down in overwhelming excitement at the first sign of the season?