See I told you I was crazy...
So this morning was a beautiful time with my Lord. I studied through Luke chapter one some and then spent time in Isaiah 42-44 and then went to Exodus, it was wonderful. The Lord had me so full I was crying as I studied. How foolish I felt for ever doubting Him.
In Luke I was reminded how Christ was my horn of salvation. How He is the horn that I can grab hold of when I have sinned against God and against man and no one can fall upon me when I have grabbed hold of Him. He is my sacrifice and He is my High Priest who intercedes for me...
Then I go to Isaiah and I praise and thank Him for not leaving me undone (Isaiah 42:16). I read through these passages of Isaiah and look closely at "Thus says the LORD" and then I write down what the thus is that the Lord says and tears stream my face as I write "I have called you by name: you are Mine!"
You are Mine, exclamation point! Oh I think of my child or any child and the passion with which they grab something that is the object of their desire or their personal possession and say "This is mine!" And I am overwhelmed that my God looks at me and calls me by name and says, "Nicole, you are Mine!"
Oh don't miss the exclamation point...
Then I open up to Exodus and begin working in Devotions From Exodus and writing on the third commandment of God "Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD your God in vain" And then it's "Oh God let me understand what this means. The totality of this command, because I do not want to take your name in vain. Make me aware of all that this means, for I want Your name to be treated as holy when it comes off my lips..."
Then the call comes that the house is going to show (oh have I mentioned the house is for sale). Oh yeh and did you read the Surrender post from yesterday? You might want to...
So I am immediately elated and confident.
Why you ask?
Well I have just had this amazing morning with God as I repented from my sins and was washed by His word and strengthened and encouraged and reminded solidly who I am in Him and to Him.
Not to mention that somehow since last Friday I have managed to clean the entire house including mopping the floors and rearranging the girls bed room to give them more space (you know space is what everybody on House Hunters wants, right?) All the laundry and dishes were already done. And on top of that Patrick and I had just went through the garage and the attic yesterday getting ready for a yard sale. The house was perfectly staged for a showing.
So this one had to be the one right?
Well we leave the house everyone all getting along, no yelling at the kids to stop making a mess, you know the "Don't you see I'm trying to pick up here!?! And you are dragging out faster than I can pick up!"
(Or is that just me?)
Anyway, we spend all day away from the house 12pm - 4pm and no realtor. Then our realtor calls and discovers that oh the realtor that is supposed to be showing our house by 4pm is still in another city that is 40 minutes away.
So we go home.
Let the dog out that's been in a kennel since 11am (because we had to get all the dog hair up out of the floor one last time)
Patrick gets his work clothes on and get's to take the crockpot pinto beans by themselves to work, no cornbread because this realtor is now supposed to be here within the hour.
So Patrick heads to work.
And I cry on the way to church. Yes, pour pitiful me cries...
I have already forgotten that I am His.
I don't know why God chooses to test me so quickly... but for some reason He does. I learn something and I get a pop quiz in 12 hrs or less.
I almost don't go to church... almost keep going... almost plan to look for a quiet spot where I can attempt to convince myself that I am alone praying, but really I'll just be having a pity party for one.
So I go to church... and truly have a blessed time.
(PS: Separate post to follow on the "blessed time")
Would you be believe the lyrics of the closing song tonight was "I am Yours, I am Yours, I am Yours, I am Yours, I am Yours, I am Yours"
I think not. There are no coincidences with a sovereign God.
So then I come home to discover that the realtor never showed.
Yep, tears again... ugh, see I told you I was crazy... a life of insanity... have I not been here before.
I know I have, because I sometimes date Scripture references in my Bible as God speaks to me on certain occasions with them and well I found one of those this morning in my study time... found, ummm most likely was led there by my ever-patient, long-suffering God.
"They quickly forgot His works;
They did not wait for His counsel,
But craved intensely in the wilderness,
And tempted God in the desert.
So He gave them their request,
But sent a wasting disease among them."
Out beside this verse I have written "Oh Father not my will but Your will be done" with Your will be done being double underlined.
The only thing that makes me feel even slightly better about this constant prayer I have of not my will but Your will be done comes from the fact that Jesus prayed this 3 times in the garden...
He is my example...
So if He prayed it 3 times then it must be okay for me to have to pray it at the very least 3 million times... right?