The funny thing is that nothing has really changed on the outside... all the same things that had me so torn up before are still here. They have not been removed, yet I have overcome in the power of my God and my everlasting hope in Christ has won me over. He always does.
The house is still on the market... even though I have learned that all my neighbors are praying against it's sale. I talked to one of our neighbors this morning who informed me that I just needed to go ahead and take that sign down because God was obviously answering her prayers and not mine. This came two days after another neighbor jokingly shared that when someone comes to look at our house she throws beer cans and a couch out in her front yard and puts on the best redneck accent her yankee accent can imitate and welcomes the lookers to the neighborhood. So I guess you can tell that the house is not for sale because we hate our neighbors. We live in an area where the "love your neighbor as yourself" command is quite easy to obey.
The truth is my plate is still full and running over.
The house, that has not yet sold, is an absolute wreck after a week of winshape camp and my husband being on nightshift (lol, this is a whole nother blog in itself).
We didn't win the lottery and nobody has showed up with a big fat check and a bunch of balloons, so the same money issues remain.
I still am waiting to find out exactly what that abnormality is that was discovered on my mammogram, I go for more tests this Friday.
I have homeschool curriculum to put together and purchase.
My dear friend and I still have to finish getting CrossRoads Christian Academy (homeschool co-op) ready for enrollment next Monday.
And... well, there's that whole wife and mother thing... that's pretty important and time consuming and plate filling all by itself.
The point is my outside circumstances have not changed. I have just chosen to rest in the sovereignty of my God.
Resting is so much better isn't it?
I like this so much more than feeling like a hamster in a cage on the wheel running my heart out but never getting anywhere... only accomplishing to wear myself out and make everyone's life around me miserable as I pout around in the depths of despair (a little Anne of Green Gables there for you).
"In repentance and rest you will be saved,
In quietness and trust is your strength."
I have to enjoy this while it lasts, because I am afraid it will not last long. Because I know me. I am thankful that God also knows me. I am so grateful that He has left us His word and has filled it with His promises and encouragements.
"Do not fear; for I am with you;
Do not anxiously look about you,
for I am your God.
I will strengthen you,
surely I will help you,
Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand."
Did you know that in the New American Standard Bible translation, the phrase "do not fear" is used 57 times and "do not be afraid" is used 46 times.
I think God is really trying to tell us something, don't you?
Now tomorrow I just might be in freak-out mode. Tomorrow, I might find myself biting my kids heads off for not picking up a mess I already twice asked them to or I might find myself grumbling my displeasure under my breathe behind somebody's back who has just said or done something to irritate the living daylights out of me (but being a Christian woman I'll just murmer to myself and sick God on them and smile anyway). Tomorrow, I might even once again find myself doubting the provision and love of my God or tomorrow I might again find myself in the pit of overwhelmment...
But today, well, it's all good :-)
Yes, today I think I'll just obey my Jesus and just rest in Him and be loved by, in, and through Him and let tomorrow take care of itself.
“So do not worry about tomorrow;
for tomorrow will care for itself..."